First if all, I’m sorry, I know I missed yesterday, but it was hectic, I’ll be sure to schedule a post for tomorrow, which will also be hectic!
Okay, I know, this doesn’t look like my usual post, but it’s going to be similar to me valentines day post (here): I give you a chat up line, and then also how to reject said chat up lines. Either way, I gotchu covered, don’t worry.
So, without further hesitation, here are some chat-up lines (and anti chat-up lines) for you:
- You won’t be needing the broom anymore, because you’ve already swept me off my feet
REPLY: Then take the broom and fly off on it.
- You are dead sexy. Literally.
REPLY: I wish I was dead after hearing that. Literally.
- Is that some candy in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
REPLY: No, it’s a gun.
- I don’t know what the trick is, but you certainly are a treat.
REPLY: The trick is you’re not getting the treat.
- That pirate outfit looks really hot on you. Wanna search me for buried treasure?
REPLY 1: I don’t think even a digger could dig deep enough for that treasure.
REPLY 2: Mate.
REPLY 3: No, I’ve got enough booty. (BECAUSE CHAT YOURSELF UP BITCHES).
- Baby, I’m a necrophiliac, how good are you at playing dead?
REPLY: Not as good as you’ll be if you don’t walk away now.
- Call me a pirate and give me that booty!
REPLY 1: I’ll call you a pirate and also call you never.
REPLY 2: How’d you feel about wearing two eye patches? Not good? Then walk away.
- Are you dressed up as a tree? Cause you’re giving me wood.
REPLY: I’d say that was more of a splinter.
- I can see a date in our future.
REPLY: I can see rejection in yours.
- I’m tired of this old broom. Got anything else I can ride?
REPLY: The bus. Home. Because that line is shameful.
- That skeleton over there wanted to ask you for your number, but, unlike me, they didn’t have the guts.
REPLY: Do they want mine after I throw them up after what you just said?
- There’s no trick in these pants.
REPLY: There’s no treat from the looks of it either.
- Wanna see my little green thing?
REPLY: No and you should go get that checked out.
- HULK SMASH?!
REPLY: Not me he doesn’t.
- I was going to go as a ghost but you’ll get to see my sheets later.
REPLY: Are you sure you’re not? Because you’re dead wrong.
- Hey, skeleton. You’re made up of 206 bones . . . want one more?
REPLY: Do you want one less? No? Then never use that line again.
- That’s not a jawbreaker. THIS is a jawbreaker.
REPLY: If you don’t walk away I can give you my very own jaw breaker and it’s not a treat in any way.
- No, that ISN’T a glo-stick in my pocket . . .
REPLY: Then you must have a radioactive dick and to get that checked out.
I wanted to try and get it to 20, but I couldn’t find, think of or physically cope with anymore. I hope I gave you some chat up lines to use, and how to respond if any of them are used.
Stay safe and stay spooky, Angels! ❤